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It’s actually really astonishing how people react when you confide in them about being sexually abused. You think the person you’d be able to confide in, the person who should have helped you, would do just that and help you. But instead they shove it under the rug and try to take care of the situation themselves. Then you’re told that your worries are silly and you shouldn’t feel this way. People have it worse than you have had it, you’ve got a pretty good life. Then it’s, like, never supposed to be brought up again, like it’s this dirty secret and you’re afraid telling anyone else would get said people in huge trouble and you are just waiting for things to get better but you’re just a ball of nerves and resentment now.
I had a nightmare about my 11 year old sister getting raped. I woke up hysterically crying and the dream has stayed with me. She is verbally abused by her father. Was the dream a wake up call that something needs to be done? or was it a warning that something will happen?
When I think about it, my mom and I have been the perfect victims, and in my sister, we have also created the perfect victim.
She is quiet and timid. She is obedient. She keeps secrets well. She doesn’t stand up for herself. She cannot speak up. She has no one to turn to who can actually stand up and make a difference.
Rebecca Ferguson, Teach Me How To Be Loved